Dear Walters Wife,
How do I get my kids to act like they do at school (angels) at home? The teachers couldn't stop talking about their helpful and thoughtful behavior.
My first thought is GREAT JOB PARENTS! You have obviously done a great job of teaching your children proper etiquette and compassionate insight. Even better news is that they are using it appropriately. Take it as a compliment and be very proud.
Home is a safe haven for each of us. It's a place where we can relax and just be ourselves. It's normal for kids to "let down their hair" a little at home. It's obvious that you have taught them well, now, encourage that same behavior at home in a gentle, loving and consistent way. While you can allow them to be comfortable at home with their own family, courtesy is still expected. Each family member needs to receive the same kind of respect and courtesy that folks outside our homes receive. If you continue to encourage them along these lines, I know you will see results. Just expect them to be more relaxed with those they know love them even when they let those manners slip occasionally. Children are like little sponges, they absorb everything around them. Continue to lead by example with your own actions and they will pick up those habits. They will realize that it makes them feel special when they are treated the way you expect them to treat others. There no better place to begin than in your home. It's sounds like you are doing a great job right now, just keep up that same persistent example and your consistency will pay off. It takes lots of love and patience to raise respectful adults.