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My Mother-In-Law said . . . .

Dear Walters Wife,
My husband and I have 2 small boys who are really a handful. My In-Laws came over for dinner last week, and my Mother-In-Law said I should always have a centerpiece on my table.
I tell you, this is the last thing on my mind and I'm a little miffed about her suggesting it. Do you think my boys will really care about a centerpiece?

Dear Daughter-In-Law,
I'm hearing your seething in your question. I have to admit that suggestions from Mother-In-Laws can sometimes be like nails on a one-room schoolhouse chalkboard. It is important to keep the peace and respect her because she is your husbands Mother. Walter seemed to like having fresh flowers on the table, even if it were a single stem of something from our garden. The children, at a young age really didn't seem to pay much attention, or so I thought. Even in the winter time, Walter would sometimes surprise me with a single rose he picked up on his way home. I always felt special when he did that. I always loved my african violets. They would often find there way to the center of the table for dinner, just to spruce things up a bit. It became a game to the children to see what I would put on the table next.
It may not seem like anything of importance, but there was a real message in that centerpiece. It was a focal point of caring and often a tender gesture from Walter to me. Now that our children have grown and have families of their own, I see how my oldest, our son, would occasionally bring home a rose to his wife. I know that he watched the way Walter spoke to me and his gentle caring ways to make me feel special. It pleases me so much to see him do the same for his young wife.
Next time you set your table, think about something special to put in the center of your table. Sometimes, even the smallest item can bring about great conversation and build memories. I'll bet your Mother-In-Law knows something about that. Her suggestion may not have been meant as a criticism. Being surrounded by a husband and two little boys, she may have thought a little feminine touch would remind the "boys" that there is a lady in the house. It is never too early to teach them how to act at the table and a centerpiece just steps things up a bit. It tells them they are special too.

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on January 12, 2009 6:00 AM.

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